Hey everyone! It’s that time of week again. 😊
I felt pretty good this past week. I was very productive, knocking out some of the items on my “to do” list in preparation for the baby and our house. Over the weekend Nate picked up our moving boxes and I started packing that day. I’ve got a color-coding system going on and so far it seems to be keeping things uber organized! Yay! I loooove being organized.
I was able to pack up all of the baby gear and clothes we’ve accumulated over the past few months, leaving out the things we’ll need for the hospital. Baby’s bag is packed and ready to go. I also packed our bag as much as I could. Some things you can’t pack until it’s actually go time! Our packing lists are on our phones and ready to go when it is time. 😊
This week the baby continued to fatten up. We had a midwife appointment on Friday and she told us the baby is head down, heartbeat is strong, and walked us through what to expect with labor & delivery with the nurse midwives at Vanderbilt. We reviewed our birth plan with her and it was very encouraging. We have the same sort of vision for how we’d like things to go, but also reviewed possibilities for change in our plans in case things aren’t going how we envisioned. I’m learning to let go of my fears about labor so I can relax about my plans, let my body do what it was made to do, and be okay with any outcome regarding the way she is born. Whether it be unmedicated, medicated, or through c-section. Birth is birth is birth and I will not allow anyone to tell me otherwise, including myself.
Which brings me to another thing I’ve been struggling with internally: body image while pregnant. I’ve felt pretty disappointed lately. I’ve gained more weight than the midwives wanted me to 😕 and I know I’ve not done a very good job in the cravings department. My meals are generally very nutritious, but I have found myself wanting a dessert every. single. day. and I have indulged that. I’ve gained visible weight in my booty and thighs and it has been a weird change to watch since I’d been working on the opposite outcome for the past 3 years. I’m currently the heaviest I’ve ever been in my life at 166 pounds…
But it’s okay!
Or at least I’m working on it being okay. I’m learning this body change is happening because my body is sustaining a life! Yes, I could have some better self control in the cravings department, but overall, when I step back and look at it, I believe I’m doing a great job taking care of myself and my baby! I am exercising at least 3-5 times a week, resting when I feel my body needs it, and eating plenty of protein, fruits, & veggies. My pregnancy is healthy, my baby is healthy, and I am healthy.
I’m curvier now, My legs are more dimply than before (hello, cellulite!), and my skin is not behaving very well (it’s like junior high all over again!)…but it’s all part of my body doing something absolutely amazing. And I am beautiful!
I’m doing my best to remember that this is temporary. Sure, my body will more than likely never quite be the same again after having a baby, but I will be able to get back to my higher-intensity workouts that I enjoy, and (hopefully) have better control over what I’m eating. I really want to keep my health as a top priority in my new mom life, I’ll just have to figure out what my new “normal” is! I may never be as fit as I was pre-pregnancy due to lack of time or effort or energy, but I am completely okay with that. And even if my plans fail miserably, I have a feeling it will be absolutely worth it.